Respect the jinx

I've always been superstitious of the "jinx." I'm always the first to say "Don't talk about it or you'll jinx it." In my first few posts I talked about anything and everyone and nothing seemingly happened. I have been keeping a lot of the big details hush hush these past few posts and am finding my sugar experience to be even more rewarding. Coincidence or was I really jinxing myself by blogging?? So because I am neurotic in some ways, I tried to figure out my the true jinx. My mom is Dominican and a big believer in the "fuku" (pronounced foo -coo). This is essentially "the jinx." I learned to respect it, regardless of whether or not I believed in its power. Maybe it's just my upbringing that's got me all wired out like a zealot. Point is, I find the less I get into the details of everything the bigger things get for me. But, writing it all out is therapeutic almost and really helps me organize my thoughts.

Saturday night was the best time. I met Mr. Lifestyle at the club (I went alone) and had a great time. We drank and I danced (he watched). We kissed, held hands, and even got a few shout outs from the DJ. It was all very cool and very fun. His nanny was there with her boyfriend which made me so uneasy. I thought she would be weird because she knows the wife but she was OK. She didn't talk to me much but she was still sweet. Her BF was very nice, maybe overly nice. But, I ignored whatever could possibly be going through his mind and had all eyes on Lifestyle. He loves that he is always saying how he believes people should be in the "present." Totally committed to whatever is in front of them.

Anyways, we had sex. It was awkward at the hotel. He was sleepy but trying to fight it because he wanted to have sex. He was hesitant, kissed e, hugged me, and barely made a move. I took over mostly because I was definitely needing it but also because I had promised my niece to take her to some adventure park a couple hours away and it was already 5am at this point. Anyways, It was pretty basic sex. I was on top for most of it. He was on top for a while but was sooo lackadaisical about it that I just flipped him around. We went round 2 which was a lot quicker. We napped for a bit and cuddled (yay!) and had a quick breakfast at 8am. He offered his truck so I can take my niece but I declined. I had already seen him for the past three days and needed a break to organize myself. I knew I would have to bring the car back and we would end up spending the night together. I am not looknig for a boyfriend. He gave me $1000 before i left!!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! Anyways, we are going to dinner tonight at PF Changs. It's a chain restaurant and not the most amazing five star place but its my fav!

There is another pot (let's call him Bostonian) who I am slightly interested in. He is offering me 2K for 1 weekend a month. He lives in boston and wants me to take the trip out there once a month. I think that is completly doable. And so convenient. If it was just about the money I would just stick to the one guy. But I am interested in more. MUCH more. I want gifts, dinners, shows, trips. And 1 weekend a month won't supply all that but it will supply me with some extra spending money. He is due to call me this evening. Let's see.

My boyfriend is back. Big time. He is showering me with affection and love and undeniably amazing sex. We are just connected. He was the reason I went to the adventure park with my niece yesterday. He offered to take her and show her a good time. My niece (and now Hendrix) is my life and he knows this. Make her happy and you've got me. And she loves him. He has been around all her life so she doesn't understand when he's not around. And in all the years we have been together, he has made it a point to always spoil her. So yesterday started us off once again. Which means, my little break of going out and about whenever I needed to is going to be a little tougher.

I gave all that I could without the fuku coming after me!

xoxo

You better leave that 9 to 5 up on that shelf....and just enjoy yourself

So my sugar search has been pretty nice. There are lots of emails flying around but I guess I will only talk about those worth talking about. I realize that I was talking about everyone before and when I look back they were not worth the keystrokes ;) So with that my top 2.

I might as well get into the Winslow talk. We met in Miami in August of 07. His nephew was googly eyed over my bff who he met on the beach. Anyways, the nephew offered us a super VIP sort of night. Limos, poppin bottles, the works, and Winslow tagged along for the ride. Well, me and Winslow hated each other at first. HATED HATED HATED. He made some outlandish joke about us only being able to get VIP because of him. He was tooting his horn a little too loudly so I told him so. He didn't like that too much. It was a pretty quick back and forth of sly sarcasm, barely even a blip in the night but he made an impression on me. I've got foot in mouth syndrome and I'm generally sarcastic so I can appreciate anyone who can go toe to toe with me even if I hat them. Anyways, long story short, we ended up taking out alot of pent up frustration out in the sheets before I came back to NJ ;)

Fast forward a few months, and we are in this cat an mouse relationship. I'm the cat. FML. He was always a mystery to me. still is. He is one of those hot then cold type guys. Miami was hot towards the end of our trip. Then it got cold. then burning hot again. So, a "hot" Winslow meant, everything I wanted and then some. We met in August of 07 and by June of 08 i had to order extra page for my passport! I mean I had everything everything everything. I was spoiled rotten and loving it. But his cold bouts were terrible. No money, no trips, nada. So April of 09 I cut him off. Cursed him out gave him hell and said goodbye.

Now he's back. It's just a hot spell for now but it is what it is. No money yet. He let me go wild at pet smart though for Hendrix. And he took me to the Springsteen concert (i'm a jersey girl, what do you expect?). So, I'm actually holed up in his place now. Hendrix pick a funny looking plant to pee on and I'm ordering movies on demand like a mad woman while he works. I want to go get my Halloween costume with him and a Macbook Pro. Anyways, we are on hot right now. Super hot. And it's weird bc I'm soo comfy with him bc of the history. I am also going to ask him for rent money before he gets cold again. I'm well aware that this won't last long but its the most solid guy I've had in a while.

Next guy is the super lovely who I guess we'll call Mr. Lifestyle. I just met him yesterday morning for a cup of coffee. We had been talking on SA and emails for almost a month. I never took him serious and then he went and jumped to #2 in a heart beat. He was infatuated with me which was great. It was very strange bc I hadn't put so much stock into him so I was just my sarcastic ass self. No sugary sweet smile or nothing. His enthusiasm was such an ego boost that I actually was super duper real. No persona. weird. So Mr. Lifestyle is legally separated which he does not want to be. Someone narc'd on him to his wife so needless to say he is trying to get her back. He was very open about keeping sugar and real world s separate. He says he loves his wife and kids and in the end they are what he wants. But he says it's a "lifestyle" that he can afford himself so he will. The big red flag was that he mentioned wanting more kids, but not with his wife. ??? The way the conversation was going I didn't get if he meant that he wanted more if the divorce went through or regardless of if they were together or not. That was just odd to me. Anyways, we are going to some club that his friend owns this Saturday night which is going to be fun. I was thinking about bringing a friend along but after Chicago's birthday thing I might not.

xoxo

Last Week Blew Up in My face

Ok so, I had planned a super tight schedule for the sugar hunt last week. Silly me, and my impatience. I was going stir crazy when I decided to set this plan in motion and in retrospect I'm an a s s h o l e. I had made everything so rigid and time constructed that I forgot to throw a life in there. And by the time I met with Mr. Boat on Wednesday I was EXHAUSTED and snippy. DUH jackass. Sheesh. I ended up cancelling on Aladdin and Teeth due to my mild psychosis that started to take over me.

So my two major hiccups were Hendrix (my love, my heart, my pug) and Winslow. Hendrix needs A LOT of attention and he has this funny way of waking me up at 5am every day like it's his job. And Winslow...hmm Winslow. Winslow is the reason I've been going to bed at 3am.

So I've re-evaluated and have figured out that quantity does not equal quality. I am starting from scratch and taking a new approach to figuring out potentials. I have a tendency to be a serial first dater. This has been my MO since before the sugar world. Even though I say I hate it I think I find a little bit of thrill in racking up my dates (enter psycho-analysis here). So, I just naturally transferred this habit into sugar world. So anybody that agreed to my expectations was garnered a first date. QUICKLY. Literally I meet guys within days of initial emails. O nooo mama, not cute, I know.

So, I am taking the weekend off for sugar experiencing and starting again on Monday with a clear agenda. And I will give myself 2weeks of emailing/talking before setting up a date. I don't know if this will work as it sounds completely boring to me but my hit-and-quit method is not working so well.

So tonight I am off to the club scene. I am going to try and make up for what went down last weekend. I want to go completely nuts and watch the sun rise when I come in. I recruited my niece as official babysitter for Hendrix and she loves it. So, I'm off without worries.

I have seen some of the posts about Favorite blogs and first thank you to the girls that mentioned my blog! I will be posting some of my favs tomorrow.

xoxo

Updates

#1: i got a ridiculously awesome job! yay me! Incidentally, Teeth frequently does business in my new office which I am not particularly fond of. I had mentioned it and he says he travels to that location at least 4 time a month. Meaning if things don't work out I will be reminded of him 4 times a month. OR maybe knowing that he will see me will force him to step his game up and not be a flaker. Maaayybbee.

#2: I have been reading all of you ladies' blogs and love that there are so many of us out there telling it like it is! Whenever I want to give up on all the sugar you guys remind me of a little virtue called Patience!

#3: Winslow is back in my life. I've mentioned him before in passing. and as much as i love to go over every detail about everyone else i hate talking about him. So for now. Let's just leave it at that.

#4: My date with the Exotic Lover went well. We went to a Tapas restaurant with live music which was cool. He gave me $500 for our time together. He seems to have put all his eggs in my basket which I hate. I hate being an SD's be all and end all. Too much pressure. Since I don't have a car either he got me car service to school for the rest of the week. He said we will work on the car thing soon. As much as i love it, My CherrySenses™ tell me he expects me to only be with him. I already have the ex and Winslow expecting the same. I might go nuts.


#5: I barely have time to really blog these days. Hendrix has taken over my life! I got to class early bc of the car service so I figured I would fill in the past few days. It's really not a huge gap in time but I've become used to blogging at least once a day. It really helps me to sort out what I'm feeling about this lifestyle and helps to organize when the sugar surges commence.

#6: Facebook is starting to become a sugar party! It's cool to be able to put a face to your blogs!

introducing HENDRIX..

the new number 1 man in my life!

{not a thing to do with sugar but he owns my heart}